Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Like bees to moldy bread

I decided I wanted to get a part-time job this semester, but I did not want to work retail or anything like that. So I decided to apply at Sylvan Learning Center, and they hired me. So now I will be working with kids again, which is good, and I'll have a bit more spending money, which is very good.


Here is some more entertainment from Overheard in NY, a site where people submit tidbits that they have overheard on the streets and trains of New York.

Guy: If Hitler were still alive and he were gay you would have thought he'd decorated that apartment. It was a soulless aesthetic abomination.

--Madison between 60th & 61st

Southern girl: I got guys asking me to send them pictures of my cooter. It's like guys know when you're taken; they flock to you like bees to moldy bread.

--3 train

Bike guy: Hey girl, I really like your red hair
Chick: Yeah, me too. That's why I dye it. But I don't like it nearly as much as I like not being interrupted when I am tryng to talk to someone.

--St. Marks & 3rd

Teen girl: Wow, that's pretty big.
Teen guy: And it won't stop growing.
Teen girl: I think you need a doctor.
Teen guy: Oh yeah? What am I supposed to say? "Hey doc, my penis just won't stop growing"? Yeah, right.
Teen girl: Uh...maybe you shouldn't say that out loud.

--Penn Station

Girl #1: What language are they singing in? Is that German?

Girl #2: No, it's European.

--Virgin MegaStore, Times Square

Guy: My dog is so racist. She is scared of black people. But she also hates the black people of dogs.
Girl: What does that even mean?
Guy: Pugs.

--33rd & 8th

Girl: We can't have sex until we get married.
Guy: Sex is a form of marriage.
Girl: But we're not ready to get married.
Guy: Your mom.

--St. Marks & 3rd

That last guy knows how to smooth-talk the ladies. And who knew that pugs were the "black people" of dogs?


At 1:57 PM, Blogger Kid C posited...

We all know Rottweilers are the black people of dogs.

At 2:57 PM, Blogger Jake posited...

I applied to teach for the Princeton Review, and part of my online application was to take a half-hour version of the GRE. My score was an abysmal 18%. The thing is, I could've cheated and used a calculator and dictionary and no one would be the wiser. So I'm not holding my breath for their phone call.

So, maybe I'll apply at the David Sylvian Learning Center instead.

At 3:51 PM, Blogger jimaal posited...

sylvian learning center that is sooooooooooooo great!! yay kids

At 4:15 PM, Blogger mayah posited...

hah it's funny because max and i have an abundance of pugs.

also, high five on the learning center.

At 4:24 PM, Blogger Carson posited...

Good luck with the new job.

My dad (who teaches at CLC) did some part time work for Sylvan in Brainerd last year. He seemed to really enjoy it.

At 4:45 PM, Blogger Houley posited...

So what do you think the doctor would say to the guys whose penis just won't stop growing?

At 6:05 PM, Blogger Johnny V posited...

Ok. The guy who was talking about Hitler sounds intelligent.

At 6:25 PM, Blogger CoachDub posited...

The doctor would say, "So what's your secret?"

At 8:03 PM, Blogger Tom posited...

yeah so he could bottle it and sell it to pfizer

At 8:53 PM, Blogger Josh posited...

He would say, you have an erection.

At 9:00 PM, Blogger Manda posited...

The Hitler guy was my favvvoorite.

At 9:40 PM, Blogger Vinnie-Senza posited...

What Nikie and I overheard at a highschool swim meet:

1st 11 year old boy: Just Deck him.
2nd 11 year old boy: Yeah, I would've decked him, I never put up with shit like that.
3rd: yeah... I shoulda decked him.

At 10:35 PM, Blogger CoachDub posited...

Jake, I didn't even know there was a 30 minute GRE. But your restraint from the lures of cheating reveals a depth of character they should take into account.

Jake Carson, from now on in posts, I cannot refer to you as "Jake," as my friend Jake (who posts under that name) seems the obvious owner of that blog moniker. So, do you prefer Carson? JC? J to the C?

At 12:15 AM, Blogger Samwalkertron posited...

D'oh. After seeing you like postsecret and I was going to reccomend Overheardinneyyork, but I see you're already a fan.

At 1:28 AM, Blogger Carson posited...

Carson should be fine.

I went to the other Jake's blog and noticed he attended Lawrence. My partner Justin also attended Lawrence. Apparently they know each other and had attended at the same time. Small world.

At 8:38 PM, Blogger Houley posited...

That Hitler remark reminds me of "The Producers."

At 5:15 PM, Blogger waintingnrain posited...

if pugs are the black people of dogs, who are the white people of dogs?
i think i'd go with...golden retrievers. maybe. i don't know though.


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