Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Everything. Everyone. Everywhere. Ends.

I have been living a lie, and it is time to come clean.

From the very first episode of Six Feet Under, the acclaimed and brilliant HBO series from a few years back, I was hooked. I loved the drama, the comedy, the darkness, the bleakness -- I loved everything about Six Feet Under.

Well, a couple of years ago, when the last season was airing, I only had HBO for the first half of the season. Since then, I had caught every episode except the series finale. But that has been one of my deepest secrets in the past couple of years. When people talked about Six Feet Under, I raved and raved, but whenever anyone wanted to talk about the finale, I would either excuse myself or I would say something like, "I still cannot talk about it."

That was a piece of clever wordsmithery on my part. Some could call it a lie.

I lied about not seeing the finale for one reason:
  • As a mega-fan of the show, I was embarrassed that I had not seen it.

I never watched the finale for a couple of reasons:
  • I thought that if I never knew how it ended, then it would mean it had not ended
  • I knew from friends that the episode was "devastating" and "heartbreaking" and "almost too much to handle."

But I could not go on with this lie any longer. (And if I ever lied to you, I apologize. I do not lie about things; this was an anomaly. I have not lied to you about anything else.) So last night I watched the series finale.

It was devastating and heartbreaking and almost too much to handle. And it was beautiful and soul-stirring. I do not know when a show has made me so emotional. It will haunt me for all the rest of my days.


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